Recently I have let stress overwhelm me to the point of getting sick enough to go to the hospital, but here is the thing…I let it happen.
You see I allowed a lot of other people’s drama to affect me mentally and emotionally to the point of making me physically ill until I realized that the people actually causing the drama were mostly trash hounds I could be content to never see again and that if they kept their behavior up that is exactly what would happen…they would be gone from all aspects of my life.
Not a single one of them was worth my time beyond making sure they couldn’t hurt my friends with their actions.
For things in my own life most of it will either be dealt with by the first week of April or I have no control over it.
In the first camp we have car stress, money stress, fixing our stove stress, being able to start cleaning my art room and garage stress and stuff like that. And the second camp I can’t change so I won’t worry about it.
The thing is I have real things I could allow to drown me with stress…my neck arthritis is far worse than I thought, my leg is healing slower than I had hoped, and my weightloss is stalled but all of these have ways I can deal with them and true stress only happens when you feel helpless.
#1 my neck…well yes that fucking sucks. But I can learn exercises, what to do and what to avoid doing to strengthen the muscles, relax the tension and relieve the pain and slow the damage. I can start with low grade pain management and hope to never get to the point of serious pain management but if I do at least I will have tried my best.
#2 my leg…it is all soft tissue damage and weakness and a bone bruise that will heal in time and the only cure for it is time, effort/exercise and pain management (which partly overlaps #1)
#3 for fuck sake I lost over 270 pounds in a short time, it is the to start working on my health, muscle tone, and stamina, if I do that and the pounds fall off fine, if not and I stay under 200 pounds I am fine…it all matters how I see it
So I realize I control my stress levels with how I see things, I am allowed to get upset, that’s reality but I don’t need to stay upset that’s a choice.