Stress and more stress

I am working so hard to learn to deal with stress better. Today I can’t tell if I am succeeding or failing miserably.
It just seems to be one bit of bad news after another today, annoying crazy person, worried about Grandma, trying to get stuff done while still allowing Alex to enjoy his vacation time and one financial fuck up after another now has us $100 in the hole and if I don’t pay all of my money we planned for my birthday party it will be more, it all is building up until I feel as if I am drowning.
Physically the stress is tearing me up.
I alternatively eat too much crappy food or not enough food at all. And I can’t tell if the pain in my stomach is hunger, just stress or the beginnings of an ulcer.
I am grinding my teeth again after not doing so for the last few years and it is so bad that while the tops of my teeth are worn flat the edges of my teeth have become very sharp and are cutting up my mouth.
On the other hand I have gotten better at not stressing about trying to get help to get stuff done if I want it done right fucking now I need to stop nagging which makes me hate myself so I am just fucking doing whatever I need done.
Sometimes I way over do and hurt myself which upsets Alex but it keeps me from screaming.
Stuff like raking the lawn tonight in the dark while Alex was getting in the shower wears me out enough to keep me from driving to the store with my last $3 and buying sweets. 
I love my husband but we have different speeds of doing things, he is a very very slow starter who once he is doing it will work until it is done.
I am fast off the block with random bursts of energy that fade out equally randomly and so I tend to rush through trying to get stuff done NOW before I fade since I don’t know when the next burst of energy will come about.
I am trying to not let his lack of jump up and get it done now drive me insane, when I let it stress me out I tend to bitch and get kind of mean since it makes me so mad that he can’t seem to understand that if we don’t do things now they might not get done for days by which time they are worse.


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