I don’t want to be her

This is me at 440+ pounds, I don’t look healthy, I don’t think I realized how big I was at the time, I honestly don’t remember it well.
I just binged on Milk Duds and I feel so sick but I keep wanting more.  I need, NEED, to remember what it was like, what I was like, I have got to remember that the pain I feel now recovering is nothing compared to the daily pain back then.
I have to remember what that was like and the only way I know how is to remember how I looked.

image

image

image

Seeing these and some from when I was a nude model makes me so sad….this can’t be me again damn it

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s