Kindness Matters, on the passing of a friend

In the last month I was lucky enough to be able to do 2 very small (to me at least) favors for a friend, I got her maps she had asked for that I get for free and it took exactly 5 mins out of my life and I gave her a spare comforter that was stuffed in a bag in my garage not being used, these meant nothing to me beyond helping a friend, I barely thought of them other than to be glad she was happy with them and that she was warm.
My friend Katherine Hughes,  died this week, and I miss her more than I thought I would.
The thing is I am now so very very glad I was able to do these simple things, I could have just not wasted my time, I could have said sorry your place is cold that sucks and not spared the lousy 5 minutes it took to dig something I probably would never have used out of my stash of random stuff I hoard just in case I can maybe, possibly actually use it someday.
I don’t say this to aggrandize myself, I am actually a pretty self centered person (at least I think I am) I know I could do so much more in this world for people but I want to make the point that EVERY LITTLE KINDNESS YOU DO MATTERS A LOT. 
Maybe we should treat people as if every day with them matters because it does
I think we should treat them as if every time we see them might be the last, not with sorrow but with joy, we should fill our interactions with others with smalls acts of kindness and joy because there will come a day when either they are remembering you or you are remembering them and there should be no regret as to how things ended.
Katherine lived her life doing a lot of good for others, she was a good person, which is one of the highest compliments I can give, she was human, she suffered a lot in her life and she always seemed to try to make an effort to rise above it.  She gave of her skills (the hat in my profile pic was made by her), she gave of her time and she wasn’t perfect, none of us are but she always tried to do as best as she could.
Sometimes we frustrated each other because we were both a lot a like and very different, but more often we found stuff to laugh at during late night text conversations.  Both of us, two women in their 40s married to younger men, were both part of a group where the average person was half our age, both of us facing disabilities, both of us trying to do our best.  She got a lot of comfort from a faith I don’t pretend to understand and where I am childless by choice she was a doting mother. 
I will miss Katherine more than I thought I would, and I will remember just how much kindness matters.

2 thoughts on “Kindness Matters, on the passing of a friend

  1. Jackie says:

    Sorry to hear about your friend. Score one for those of us who save things that will more than likely be useful to someone someday!

  2. sorry for your friend . yes , what you said was true ,we should treat everyone with kindness and as if this is the last time we are spending with them .shall try to remember these words .

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