30 random things about me (cause I was bored)

1. I am the most in love I have ever been, but it took being in the worst relationship I have ever been in to realize I deserve to be loved the way I want to and I am worth it.  I love Alex Lockary and for the first time in my life truly believe someone honestly loves me.
2. I LOVE crafting but wish I was more inspired about my painting, I am just not driven to do it these days.
3. Alex is the first person I have been able to sleep cuddling, I have been able to cuddle before but seldom able to sleep touching anyone, until him.
4. I am 16 years older than my fiancé and he doesn’t care so I try not to let it bother me
5. I once weighed 463 pounds, I have lost nearly 150 and have about another 130 to go so I can  get my knees replaced
6. The Goth community has been the most supportive people I have ever known, closely followed by the gamers (lot of cross over there) I feel more at home with them then any group(s) of people I have ever known
7.  I have a serious sleep disorder, I can usually only sleep a few hours at a time and then I am up for at least a few hours and my sleep is hardly ever really deep.
8. I suffer from both winter and summer Seasonal Affective Disorder
9. I have had probably a dozen different hair colors and twice that many Mohawks in my time (as recent as April 2010 for purple hair)
10. I had laparoscopic duodenal switch with a pancreatic sleeve (they cut out 80% of my stomach and rerouted my intestines) in April of 2010 to help me lose weight, I only spent 3 days in the hospital.
11.  I like children but I have NEVER, even as a child, wanted to have my own, there is too much wrong with my health to pass on or to allow me to be a good parent
12.  The thought that I am pretty much getting to be too old to have kids does not bother me much at all really.
13. I am very allergic to MSG, I didn’t use to be but over the last 2 years it has gotten really bad and I don’t just swell up but get physically ill.
14.  On of the hardest things with weight loss surgery for me is not having to eat less or not eating sweets unless I want to get ill, it is not being able to eat and drink liquid in the same meal, I use to be the person who had 5 glasses of water at a meal.
15.  I actually like my protein drinks, I use Syntrax Nectar in Vanilla, Chocolate, Lemonade and coffee flavors and then add flavored syrups, for me they are a real treat.
16. I am a craft/art supply junky, it makes me happy to get stuff for art or crafts even if I am not doing anything with it right now.
17. I REALLY enjoy doing all the Do It Yourself stuff for our handfasting in April 2011 but I am very sad I had to pretty much give up on getting 1000 paper cranes done, I had to accept that there are a lot more important things that need doing
18. I am horribly impulsive but if I can force myself to wait I can usually talk myself down, I have been know to return impulse buys or talk myself out of something before I can even buy it
19. I am one of those horrible people who leave things (not perishables) in the wrong place at stores, I change my mind about something and leave it where ever.
20. I went to university first for Art and then for Creative Writing/English for nearly 4 years, I have about 2 solid years to go to get a BA of fine arts and 3 to get one in English.
21. I HATED school until I got to college, then suddenly I realize I was excited to be learning and enjoyed the environment of education without the horrible bullying I suffered through out my school years.
22. My family has been amazingly supportive of me, they think Alex is amazing and that our Offbeat plans for a handfasting are the coolest thing and so me, they think I am talented and smart even when I have not thought it.
23.  One of my mottos is “an undecorated life is not worth living”
24.  I would not trade my silver garnet ring for a platinum/diamond ring for even a heartbeat, I REALLY dislike diamonds.
25. I love coffee with lots of milk, even decaf, I even have coffee flavored protein drink mix, I have tons of Torani and DiVinci drink flavoring syrups.
26. I feel guilty because while I love my cat I am not much for sitting there petting on him since it makes me itch, I wish I was a better kitty-mama
27.  I am 41 and my father can still hurt my feelings without even trying just by being a flake, I don’t think you ever completely grow out of wanting your parents to be there for you when you need them
28.  I don’t feel as if I am very “cool”
29, I hate that losing weight is making me start to look so much older but I like that I don’t take as much pain meds but at the same time I worry I am not losing weight fast enough and will stall.
30.  I am actually a very happy person over all.

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